Here's the link: http://pukingpastilles.com/?p=285
This is so funny, and so true. I especially love number 12.
Things I’ve learned being a parent
1. It doesn’t feel good to step on a triceratops
2. Everyone has a favorite kid. Mine is the one who can’t talk back.
3. Toys are overrated. Buy a shopping cart full of junk at DI instead. Every item will eventually become a light saber. Or a piece of artwork.
4. Threats only last as long as their attention span does. Which is divided by 100 when the TV is on.
5. No one except the babysitter will ever know what they wear to bed. And you pay her.
6. I never listen 100% to anything.
7. Family traditions are much more work than people let on. Wouldn’t it be easier to decorate the tree in perfect silence at 2am? I’m just sayin.
8. There will never be any moment in time when every single member of the family looks presentable at the same time. Ever.
9. Any crime can be forgiven by looking at them while they’re sleeping.
10. It is REALLY hard not to laugh when they use a bad word appropriately. REALLY hard.
11. Other people’s kids are much dumber and annoying than mine. With a few rare exceptions.
12. When you ignore them for too long, something really bad happens.
13. Phrases I hated like, “Go ahead, gourd-head” and “I don’t see your arm in a sling” are suddenly very liberating.
14. Having a big, overprotective dog is really awesome when solicitors come knocking. (this has nothing to do with parenting, but it totally rocks)
15. On the other hand, having children with no social inhibitions is really bad when solicitors come knocking.
16. Letting them “help” is a humongaloid hassle.
17. Finding a good babysitter is like finding an honest mechanic. Needle in a haystack, people.
18. You couldn’t pay me enough to be a nanny.
19. Being logical with them really backfires.
20. A rigid bedtime is my sanity. Take my sanity away, and it all goes to hell in a handbasket.
4 comments:
See, I was thinking how clever and funny you were with your list. Then I checked out the link and was so disappointed.
We've been sick so if I'm not at church tomorrow you can stop by the house before or after if you want to get the baby food.
those are awesome i might have to borrow those one of these days! i've missed so much on your blog! thank goodness i have my computer back i missed catching up with peoples lives pathetic eh! oh well cutest hat ever and looks like you had a great christmas!! ttys
How funny and how true some of those are! Thanks for sharing:)
Funny. Except I don't get the one about the arm in a sling...
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