Funny stories

I was looking through old posts I had written on my family's website, and I came across a number of very funny stories. I thought I'd share (with some old pictures as well, because that's fun).

Apr 17, 2002

I must be the best wife in the world, because Brett loved the present I got him soooooo much!!! It's a headlamp, which is a light attached to a band that goes around your head. It was a pretty nifty one--it has three brightnesses and flashes. The light is a bluish color. The first night he had it, Brett took it into the closet to try it out. The second night, we had to shower in the dark with only the headlamp (it's waterproof). What a psycho!!! It was pretty fun. And last night when he got up to from dinner to go do homework he said, "I gotta go put my thinking cap on," and he came back with the headlamp on. Wow. It's obvious why I love him so much.

Jul 19, 2005 So, after Jethro had gone potty, I was trying to pull up his pants, with my hand on the waist of his shorts tugging. All of the sudden I heard Brett say, "What are you doing?" and I realized it was in the middle of the night and I had been dreaming. Instead of pulling up Jethro's shorts, I had my hand on the waist of Brett's underwear and was trying to tug them up. I said, "Oh sorry, I dreamed I was pulling up Jethro's pants." and then I fell asleep so immediately that in the morning I wasn't sure if the whole thing had happened or not. Hee hee.

Mar 4, 2005 Funny Jethro story: The other day I was making toast and whenever I make ANYTHING he wants to sit up on the counter to watch. So, he was begging to get up, but I told him no because there wasn't any room what with the toaster and a plate and the butter and honey up there. So he says, "I'll go get my stool" and ran away to find his plastic blocks case--which he couldn't find. So instead he comes back with.............a book. "I got this!" and he puts it on the ground and steps up all of a 1/4 inch. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! I laughed so hard.

He was at the babysitter the other night (Brett and I were at institute) and when we got home he told me that he went to the potty at Cedar's house. He said "I pooped. And I peeped." HAHAHAHAHHA

Jul 26, 2005 Okay, so when a friend in my ward moved she gave us a power wheels jeep for Jethro but it wasn't working. So finally Brett decided to fix it, and he put a car battery in it. Not just a new power wheels little battery, a big car battery. So, it was running great. Jethro spent probably forty minutes driving it all around, good times, Hazel sat beside him, it's all good, and then Jethro ran into a tree, and flipped the hi-lo switch, and it started smoking like crazy. He started screaming and ran away and said "I'm burning!" (He wasn't.) Brett decided that when he next fixes it, he will have to put a fuse on it.

Jethro for some strange and unexpected reason, wanted to vacuum yesterday. So I gave him the vacuum and said go for it. He was in the hall and I was in the kitchen, and then I heard him screaming (truly frightened), "The rhinoceros!! Rhinoceros!" I came out, and turned off the vacuum and I didn't really know what the matter was but he was pointing at the part that holds the dirt and spins it around, and so I thought he thought it was scary. Anyway, I took it out and opened it and showed him that it was just dirt and then put it back on. Then I turned the vacuum on, and it started smoking and Jethro screamed "I'm burning!" and ran into Hazel's room as far back as he could get. I just turned it off without further investigation and put it away for Brett to look at. Jethro was so scared that he wouldn't come out to where the vacuum had been, so he yelled"Come get me!" When Brett got home I told him that he should fix the vacuum and he said "what's the matter"" and I said I didn't know but it was smoking. So he took it out, turned it up and said, "Well, of course--there's a rhinoceros in there." HAHAHAAHAHHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!! Jethro had sucked up a soft little toy rhinoceros rattle thingee and it was stuck in the bottom of the hole. I started laughing so hard. I was like, why did I think Jethro was saying rhinoceros? Anyway, maybe you had to be there, but it was pretty dang hilarious.

Apr 25, 2005 We had a jello salad for dinner that has a bottom layer, a middle cool whip layer, and then a top layer of jello. We had eaten a little the night before, so the top had slid a little bit and it made cracks on the top jello layer. Brett took the lid off, peered intently at it and said, "interesting stress pattern!"

Sep 13, 2005 The district manager for my paper route came to my house yesterday for me to sign a paper. He said to Hazel "Hello, young lady. Do you talk yet?" and I said, "She only quacks." And right on cue, Hazel said, "Quack."

Sep 19, 2005 I saw this quote today on a scrapbook site. I love it.
"I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes
and six months later you have to start all over again."
- Joan Rivers

Andrea: So Kayli, how does Brett feel about this quote???

Kayli: He growled. I choose to think that that means he likes it very much.

Dec 5, 2005 Sheesh. That is cold. It is cold here too, but I don't know the temp. Anyway, it makes me want to stay all day in the warm house.
Yesterday as we were walking in to church I said to Brett, "We should make cinnamon rolls today." and he said, "Yes! Those kind of super ideas are why I married you."

Apr 5, 2006 By the way, the sun is shining, the flowers are blooming, and I am pregnant.
I'm due about Nov 13. Jethro says if it's a boy it's name will be Max, and if it's a girl, her name with be Buster. I don't know where he got that.

Apr 25, 2006 On Sunday in primary they were singing "do as I'm doing" but the kids got to pick animals to be like, and after about 4 kids, Jethro got chosen, so he walked up and looked around for awhile, like he was looking for inspiration, and finally said, "A stinkbug." What?! Some people's children.

Also, the other day I was driving home from the park at 5:00 and there was lots of traffic. At one point I had to slam really hard on my brakes to not hit the car in front of me. I said, "Crap!" After a minute, Jethro said, "Why did you say crap?" and I said, "Because I thought I wasn't going to stop in time." Then he was quiet for a couple minutes. Then he said, "When I get big, and I almost don't stop in time, I'm going to say crap."

Today Jethro had to get a cavity filled in his tooth, and after they gave him a shot and he cried, then they wrapped him up in a blanket like a tortilla which he didn't like, so he was making his angry faces and noises, and he said, "I'm getting very ARGUED!!" hee hee. The dental assistant thought that was very funny.

Brett took me out to dinner at the Olive Garden which was delicious and after we picked up the kids and were on our way home, he was looking at the receipt cause I wondered how much his juice cost. (It was 2.15 by the way.) Then, I looked over at him, and he had the receipt stuck up his nose. I yelped (understandably) and said, "What are you doing?" And he said, "Pulling a Jack Rasmussen." Which was HILARIOUS!!!!! because the first thing in my head was, "whoa, dad!"

I've told you before that Jethro LOVES Ethne, well, today he said, "Can I marry Ethne? Some people get married when they're four."

Hazel liked her "Tink-bell" and she is the cutest little fairy ever!!! When Hazel and Jethro were undressing to get in the tub, I told Jethro to try on Hazel's fairy dress because I wanted to see how it fit on a taller kid. He vehemently refused, despite my trying to be serious and count to three. Daddy was reading a book and I said, "Daddy, tell Jethro to obey me." And so he said, "Jethro, obey your mother." and Jethro came over finally and put the dress on (still highly opposed) and I started laughing, and Brett looked up and said, "THAT'S what I was telling him to do?!" It was so funny. Then Brett told him to take it off immediately. Ha HAAA!